Before We Pathologize Anxiety

Anxiety is real. For many people it is painful, disruptive, and deserving of serious care and support. This is not an argument that anxiety can be solved with lifestyle changes alone, and it is definitely not a suggestion that people should simply “try harder” or manage better. It is an argument for a both-and approach: Checking in on the nervous system and getting the help you need. Sometimes we assume something is seriously wrong before looking at whether the body and nervous system are maxed out, overwhelmed, or overstimulated. And sometimes when those basics are ignored, even the best therapy or medication has a harder time working.

We live in a culture that is quick to label distress, and sometimes that is necessary. But we also live in a culture that normalizes a lifestyle that makes us sick, mentally and physically. Chronic exhaustion, constant stimulation, and relentless stress are baseline functioning for many people these days. When these conditions are accepted as “normal” and signs and symptoms are neglected or ignored, anxiety can feel more intense and harder to manage than it otherwise might be. This does not mean anxiety is only situational or that it disappears when life improves, but it does mean context matters more than we often realize.

Two things can be true at the same time: Anxiety can be serious and deserving of treatment and it can also be made worse by everyday factors we have come to accept as normal.

One of the challenges is how quickly stress gets interpreted as danger. Many people notice anxious thoughts or physical sensations and immediately assume something is wrong with them. They start monitoring themselves closely, scanning for symptoms, and trying to figure out what their anxiety means. That kind of vigilance, while understandable, tends to keep the nervous system activated. When anxiety itself becomes something to fear or analyze constantly, it can start to take up more space rather than less. In that sense, rushing to explanation or diagnosis can sometimes worsen the exact experience people are trying to escape.

This doesn’t happen in a vacuum. It is shaped by how most people are living. Many people are getting too little sleep, skipping meals, barely eating or eating inconsistently, chronically plugged in and moving through their days without any real breaks. Even rest is often filled with screens or treated like something to manage or optimize. There’s very little time to slow down, be bored, or let feelings settle. In that kind of life, anxiety is a wake up call. It is functioning as communication with your body, a natural response to being constantly stretched and rarely allowed to truly come down.

Sleep is one of the most overlooked. Chronic lack of sleep lowers our ability to cope and makes the nervous system more reactive. When people are exhausted, their tolerance for stress drops, and sensations of anxiety show up more quickly and more intensely. Feeding our bodies matters as well. Irregular eating or not eating enough can cause physical symptoms such as shakiness, irritability, and racing thoughts that closely resemble anxiety. A hungry brain cannot regulate emotions. These signals are usually interpreted as psychological when they are, at least in part, physiological. Addressing these basics does not eliminate anxiety for everyone, but ignoring them often makes anxiety harder to treat.

Caffeine and alcohol can also play a role. Stimulants can increase anxiety, and alcohol, even in small amounts, can spike anxious feelings the following day. Movement (exercise) is another factor that is often misunderstood. This is not about exercise as a cure or about weight or discipline. Regular movement helps eliminate stress from the body and supports mood and well-being. Regular exercise can settle the nervous system in ways that thinking and insight alone cannot. 

Many people are also living in a constant state of urgency. Rushing from task to task and multitasking throughout the day keeps the body on high alert. When everything feels urgent, the nervous system never gets the message that it is safe to slow down. Alongside that is the question of rest. Scrolling and constant content consumption can feel like downtime, but they don't actually give the brain or body a chance to reset. True rest tends to involve less input, not more. Unplugging more should be on your list of self-care priorities. THANK YOU HASHEM FOR SHABBOS!

It is also worth mentioning how often people let themselves be alone with their thoughts versus being constantly distracted. When every quiet moment is filled with noise or stimulation, stillness can feel strange, uncomfortable or even threatening. This is not about forcing reflection or overthinking. It is about building tolerance for quiet, calm and even boredom (!!) and allowing the nervous system to experience chunks of time without constant “stuff”.

Social media and nonstop news exposure add another layer. Comparison, outrage, and a steady stream of endless bad news can raise baseline anxiety in ways people do not always recognize. A reminder that our nervous systems were not designed for this amount of bad news, graphic images of war and death and hundreds of “social connections” bombarding us daily with their “morning routines”. 

Relationships matter too. Anxiety does not exist in a vacuum. The emotional climate created by the people we spend time with can either support our nervous system or keep it on edge. Chronic criticism, conflict, or unpredictability can make anxiety worse, while steady and supportive relationships can have a stabilizing effect.

Paying attention to these factors does not replace therapy, medication, or other clinical interventions. In many cases, it allows those supports to work better. When the nervous system is less depleted and overstimulated, people will have more capacity to reflect, regulate emotions, and benefit from deeper work.

None of this minimizes anxiety or suggests it should be easy to manage. It simply broadens the lens. Sometimes anxiety is a signal that something internal needs attention. And sometimes it is a very understandable response to how overstretched, underslept, overstimulated, and unsupported people are.

Before assuming something is broken, it may be worth asking a more practical question about what the nervous system needs right now, and then seeking the support that helps answer it.